The Ego Trap

I have yet to meet a strong ego.

Egos are fragile things. The people I know who have the biggest ones are very fierce in their defense of it. Ego requires it. It needs protection; it takes more than it gives (if it gives anything at all).

Ego comes with demands. It limits creative people rather than frees us to be many things (it really likes ‘either or’ instead of ‘and’). It carries a whip demanding obedience: Repeat after me “I am…” and dare you change or ignore it, the punishment is swift, merciless. It haunts you. It can keep you up at night with its recriminations: How dare you? Who do you think you are!! You think you can defy me? I know who you are. I made you!

Therefore, many fall to their ego for fear of being revealed as a fraud (we are all frauds in a way if that means doing the best we can as fallible humans and trying to connect someone else with our work).

Some of you may be confused right now. Didn’t I say that I’ve yet to meet a strong ego? Aren’t I proving that egos are strong?

No, I stand by my initial statement.

I’ve never met an ego that didn’t need to be defended, that had no need for a shield.

Egos swallow creative dreams daily. Egos must be handled differently, instead of the way we’ve been taught. I encourage you to seek an alternative method.

Do not deny the ego, do not deny its presence (it hates that), do not deny that it exists (it hates that even more) but, if possible, starve it a little so that it doesn’t grow.

While its body is fragile (easily wounded, easily broken) its roots run deep. Don’t deny this reality. Acceptance is the way out. Give your ego a name, if necessary. Separate it from yourself, shine a light on it. It tends to shrink when put in the spotlight.

Oh, that’s my ego speaking.

Oh, there goes my ego again, making me feel bad.

My ego wants to be fed, that’s all. but I don’t have to fall into that vicious trap again.

You can steal its power and importance by laughing at it a little, not in a mean way, but realizing that it’s rather silly and just wants to help.

With its size reduced you can be free to do as you please.

And enjoy life being imperfectly you.